Jack-9 years old
At some point, maybe I'll start one of these 'sappy' blogs a little differently. Maybe I won't lament about how time flies, or maybe I won't make corny jokes about looking under the couch for lost time. Maybe one day...but this is not that day. Especially since I'm writing about my oldest child entering his last year of single digits. The child that made me a Mommy is turning 9. Nine. NINE.
I know I had a life before I had children. I was a daughter, a sister, a wife, a friend. I enjoyed my life before kids. But, I dare say that I didn't really start LIVING until July 8, 2007. I starting living life with a new perspective. I started living for someone else, which in turn made me start living more for myself. That may not make sense, especially if you don't have kids, but trust me, it happens.
I can remember finding out that I was pregnant with you, Jack. It was Halloween 2006. I remember telling Daddy. I remember telling our families. I remember the sickness, the pain, the hospital stays. I remember our ultrasound scares. I remember it all like it was yesterday, I remember going into labor. I remember all of those hours of anticipation. I remember finding out that I needed a c-section. I remember your first cry. I remember seeing you for the first time. I remember it all like it was yesterday. But...it wasn't yesterday.
Or last week.
Or last month.
Or last year.
It was 9 years ago.
I don't remember what I ate for dinner last night, nor do I remember my own name half of the time, but the memories I have of you are so clear and so concise. I'm thankful for that. If I close my eyes and think really hard, I can actually still picture holding you for the first time. I can picture our first day home from the hospital. I never did finish your baby book, but it's okay, because it's all up in my head where it belongs. Where it will stay forever.
So, let's talk about now, shall we? Let's talk about the tall, handsome, helpful, beautiful, happy boy that you are. The best big brother, the best oldest child. The snuggliest boy with the biggest heart. You aren't the "typical" boy, Jack. You're not into sports, or video games. You like to read. You like to draw. You like to sing and dance. Your imagination is amazing. You love to design things. You have aspirations of opening a cupcake bakery. You want to take pottery classes. You're funny. You're super smart. You have such a twinkle in your eye. Your smile and laugh is contagious.
You're starting to venture into more 'big kid' things. You've expressed an interest in learning how to cook so we are going to work on that this summer. You are your happiest snuggling and watching TV. You love to play in the pool. You love your friends. You love your family. You're super sensitive (a blessing and a curse.)
You're kind of a smart ass. This may be Daddy's favorite part about you. You also love to help Daddy do anything. Since you're getting older, he's been asking for your help with things more and more and you're more than happy to oblige. I know Dad loves having a boy that he can count on for help, so thank you for being so willing. He has a lot to teach you, kiddo!
So here you are, nine. 9. NINE. N I N E. I don't know why that seems so OLD to me. When you were born, nine seemed so far away. When you were 3, nine seemed so far away. When you were 6, nine seemed so far away. And now it's not far away anymore. It's here.
My birthday wish for you Jack is this: I hope that you understand how loved and how special you are. I hope you understand how happy you make people. I hope you understand how bright your smile is, or how bright that twinkle in your eye is. I hope you can comprehend somehow how important you are to me and just how much I love you. You are my Number One. My Dude. My "Just Jack." My Love. My Jackboo.
I know I had a life before I had children. I was a daughter, a sister, a wife, a friend. I enjoyed my life before kids. But, I dare say that I didn't really start LIVING until July 8, 2007. I starting living life with a new perspective. I started living for someone else, which in turn made me start living more for myself. That may not make sense, especially if you don't have kids, but trust me, it happens.
I can remember finding out that I was pregnant with you, Jack. It was Halloween 2006. I remember telling Daddy. I remember telling our families. I remember the sickness, the pain, the hospital stays. I remember our ultrasound scares. I remember it all like it was yesterday, I remember going into labor. I remember all of those hours of anticipation. I remember finding out that I needed a c-section. I remember your first cry. I remember seeing you for the first time. I remember it all like it was yesterday. But...it wasn't yesterday.
Or last week.
Or last month.
Or last year.
It was 9 years ago.
I don't remember what I ate for dinner last night, nor do I remember my own name half of the time, but the memories I have of you are so clear and so concise. I'm thankful for that. If I close my eyes and think really hard, I can actually still picture holding you for the first time. I can picture our first day home from the hospital. I never did finish your baby book, but it's okay, because it's all up in my head where it belongs. Where it will stay forever.
So, let's talk about now, shall we? Let's talk about the tall, handsome, helpful, beautiful, happy boy that you are. The best big brother, the best oldest child. The snuggliest boy with the biggest heart. You aren't the "typical" boy, Jack. You're not into sports, or video games. You like to read. You like to draw. You like to sing and dance. Your imagination is amazing. You love to design things. You have aspirations of opening a cupcake bakery. You want to take pottery classes. You're funny. You're super smart. You have such a twinkle in your eye. Your smile and laugh is contagious.
You're starting to venture into more 'big kid' things. You've expressed an interest in learning how to cook so we are going to work on that this summer. You are your happiest snuggling and watching TV. You love to play in the pool. You love your friends. You love your family. You're super sensitive (a blessing and a curse.)
You're kind of a smart ass. This may be Daddy's favorite part about you. You also love to help Daddy do anything. Since you're getting older, he's been asking for your help with things more and more and you're more than happy to oblige. I know Dad loves having a boy that he can count on for help, so thank you for being so willing. He has a lot to teach you, kiddo!
So here you are, nine. 9. NINE. N I N E. I don't know why that seems so OLD to me. When you were born, nine seemed so far away. When you were 3, nine seemed so far away. When you were 6, nine seemed so far away. And now it's not far away anymore. It's here.
My birthday wish for you Jack is this: I hope that you understand how loved and how special you are. I hope you understand how happy you make people. I hope you understand how bright your smile is, or how bright that twinkle in your eye is. I hope you can comprehend somehow how important you are to me and just how much I love you. You are my Number One. My Dude. My "Just Jack." My Love. My Jackboo.
And I thank you for choosing me
To come through unto life to be
A beautiful reflection of his grace
For I know that a gift so great
Is only one god could create
And I'm reminded every time I see your face
To come through unto life to be
A beautiful reflection of his grace
For I know that a gift so great
Is only one god could create
And I'm reminded every time I see your face
Our 4am Feeding Song
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| Now |
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